We will all have times in our lives where we feel slightly uneasy and disillusioned about life.
These are often times when we have stopped to reflect and often compare ourselves with others, or the person we hoped to be. We may have had dreams and aspirations, but have found ourselves on a path that we didn't expect or necessarily wanted to follow. This can sometimes occur through bad decisions that may have been made by ourselves or by others on our behalf, but most of the time it seems that it's just the way life is!
It's a scary and disorienting time and can lead us to making drastic decisions and changes in a bid to rescue what we feel we have lost or missed out on. This could range from buying a sports car, a career change, going sky diving or in a worst case scenario divorce or suicide where even life itself has been questioned.
We may also feel disillusioned by people or systems that we trust, which is a major factor for political upheavals and/or wars. Of course, governments would rather people didn't question the status quo and make every effort to keep up the illusion that they know what they are doing and have everything under control!
For those who are people of faith, it can lead to very big questions about the meaning of life too. Where is God? Is there a God? How could He let this happen? Does He care?
So what does disillusionment mean?
"a freeing or a being freed from illusion or conviction."
So to be disillusioned is to be freed, but from what?
- Illusion -"something that deceives by producing a false or misleading impression of reality."
- Conviction - "a fixed or firm belief."
This definition seems to suggest that the process of disillusionment is a positive experience. It suggests that we have been believing a lie and that through this process we are able to see through it. But often, this experience leads to fear and insecurity as we begin to see that everything we have banked on in life, can't actually support us. A recent example may be the recession and the failings of the banks.
So who can we trust? Who can we turn to for the real answers? Where can we find truth?
Jesus would often start his sentences with the phrase "I tell you the truth..." He could obviously see people who were a little disillusioned with life and were looking for answers. They may have been disillusioned with the Romans who ruled over them or the religious systems that demanded so much from them or things had happened in their life that had forced them to ask questions. They were looking for a way of life that would be fulfilling and not oppressive, but also attainable.
Jesus also described Himself as 'the truth' (John 14:6) and pointed to the Holy Spirit as someone who 'would guide into all truth' (John 16:13). God is revealing Himself as someone we can trust, someone we can pin our hopes on, someone who will not let us down, someone we won't be deceived by.
So why is it then that we sometimes feel disillusioned with God?
If we go back to the definition, it would seem that this would leave us open to questioning God as a firm belief in our lives. What if it's all been a lie? What if there is no God and all the decisions I've made have been for nothing? Have I been wasting time?
But what if our disillusionment was not with God Himself, rather a god we have created?
This is why I think disillusionment in the Christian faith is such a healthy process, as we strip back all of the periphery stuff and get to the heart of the matter. We question who God is, what the church is about, why we take part in the practices we do, why there is suffering, and who we are in the midst of all that.
I believe that when we come to that place, we will get answers to our questions. We may find that a lot of the things we thought about God and what it means to follow Jesus were illusions and that God is leading us through disillusionment, in order to find the truth in Jesus.
Are we a Church that encourages and supports those who are disillusioned or do we label them as bad apples that may cause problems?
Are we willing to be childlike and ask the big questions without an agenda behind it?
Are you willing to be 'changed by the renewing of your mind' (Romans 12:2)?
I'm sure there are many more things I could write on this, but here are my initial thoughts. Would love to open a conversation on the comments page if anyone wants to join?
What are your experiences of disillusionment?
Have you ever seen it as a positive process?
e.t.c, e.t.c...
